I feel like everything on my blog lately is the same:

confessions about my lack of time to do much of anything…

expressions of how utterly exhausted I am most days…

excitement for all of the things that I want to do…

and happiness over the design waiting list that continues to grow.

Let me emphasize heavily how blessed I feel to be doing what I enjoy doing and contributing to our family.

We’re planning a big vacation in the fall and I am beyond grateful that, for the first time in three years, I am able to help out my husband. For the first time since we got married the financial burden isn’t all on him. We’re now a two income family and I can see huge differences in how we handle our finances, the relationship between the two of us, and just our family life in general. He hasn’t come out and said it, but I think maybe me working helped to lift some of the financial burden that he was feeling (whether he’d ever say he felt it or not).

But, being a business owner hasn’t come without sacrifices.

Sacrificing sleep.

Sacrificing “me” time.

Sacrificing weekends and early bedtimes.

Sacrificing time that I could have spent with Little Man.

Sacrificing lazy evenings on the couch watching bad tv.

Sacrificing lazy…anything.

I have so much admiration for moms who work outside of the home. At least working from home gives me some kind of chance to do laundry in between emails or designs. Working away from home? I can’t imagine.

And that said, I don’t discredit stay-at-home moms either. Because I was one. And being home all day, every day with a kid? That, in itself, is admirable.

I guess all of that to say this:

Thank you to those of you who continue to read and comment and take an active part in my blog, even when I can’t  (and honestly haven’t been lately…) visit you back. I will find some kind of balance.

A balance that lets me be the blogger that I was, the designer that I am, the mother that my son needs, the wife my husband deserves, and the photographer that I want to be.

But for at least a few more days, I’ll have the keep sacrificing time on the blog. That’s the only area I have to give in right now.

I can’t sacrifice time with my family. Because if I don’t get to spend time with them, then what’s the point of any of the rest? I can’t give any in my business. Because I have clients who expect things and I don’t want to let them down. And I can’t give any in photography…because that business isn’t even off the ground yet.

I’ll get there.

I swear.

Because I’m too determined not to.

I’ll be visiting everyone’s 52 Faces posts from last week today. See? I told you I was behind. And I have a whole slew of photos that I was going to use for this weeks challenge, but I didn’t get around to editing them. Just this one…that was my absolute favorite.






  1. says

    I’ve learned that sacrifices are necessary. Just be sure to keep hold of what matters most, your family, your sanity, your sleep. It’s tough being a work-at-home mom. I know from experience. Are you getting much paid help? Looking back on my time as a WAHM, that’s something I wish I would have done, rather than buy into everyone’s assumption that because I was technically home I could do everything around the house, with my daughter, and for my full time job.

    Know that we, your readers, will be here regardless. I forgot to link up last week, but I am this week. Your picture is beautiful. Be well!

  2. Kelly says

    Courtney- my heart goes out to you, I know exactly where you are(well not exactly, I haven’t launched my own business yet), but I do understand your struggles. It is hard. Sometimes all consuming, and that to do list just keeps getting bigger the more we try to let go of it. I read about this artist talking to her mentor, lamenting about finding balance. And her mentor said ” you will never get there, so you can let it go”. While not the most positive thing, I myself have seen that just letting go of trying to find balance and focusing on the things that matter most, that balance starts to find a beautiful place in our heart. Kudos for already figuring this out! 🙂

  3. says

    You’re doing a great job! Balance is so hard. I don’t know if anyone ever really succeeds. But keep up the great work mama! I’m so, so happy for you!

  4. says

    i have done it all too… working full time, not working at all, working part-time right now. It is all hard. You are so right – either way you are sacrificing something. The internet is the first to go… hang in there. How exciting to be planning a vacation.

  5. says

    Oh girl, I know exactly where you are coming from. Hubby and I have been talking about ways I can bring in income by working from home and my biggest question is “When will I fit it in?!”.

    You’re doing awesome. Sacrifice what you need to. We’ll all still be here. And if you haven’t noticed, my blog writing and reading has been sacrificed too recently. But that doesn’t mean I still don’t love you! xo

  6. says

    I have felt the same way lately. I’m struggling to find that perfect balance and it just doesn’t seem to click yet. It will. Eventually.

    This also scares me because I know it will be a little harder once my business launches. But it will be okay. Part of me also feels down because of the long winter months. Now that Spring is around the corner I’m hoping it gets easier.

  7. says

    I think as moms, we’re all pretty hard on ourselves. Working mom, WAHM, SAHM, doesn’t matter. We work HARD, y’all. 🙂 I’m glad we’re getting a vacation in a couple of months, too!

    • says

      Amen! Moms are some of the hardest working people out there. It’s insane the amount of “give” we have in us. Where are you guys going?

      • says

        We’re going to Arkansas to visit family. It’s our home state, and we hope to get to move back there soon. But this economy…blech.

  8. says

    You have a lot going on. I am thankful your blog design business is allowing you the opportunity to help your family. I bet you are looking forward to your vacation! Where are you going?

    • says

      We are going back home to Alabama to visit family for a month. We’re planning on taking Noah to Disney World while we’re there and have a few other little day trips planned. We’re really looking forward to some down time with family. Husband is taking me to the beach for a week: just the two of us. After 20 months in Alaska with no family and no alone time, it will definitely be worth it!

  9. says

    I understand completely. The lack of “me” time is what is killing my inspiration for blogging, I think. You’re doing great with your business (hey, I hired you!) and your photography is wonderful! Just keep truckin’ along, which is what I’m doing now.

    • says

      And have I told you how EXCITED I am to be working with you?! 🙂 Cause I totally am! I think part of my slump is a result of the long winter we’ve had, too. Bleh. I’m so over cold and snow! Keep moving forward. We’ll come out of this eventually!

  10. says

    Girl I know how hard it is to be a work at home mom. It’s really tough trying to find that balance. I wrote a post about it recently actually. But through it all, it is very rewarding to be able to contribute to the household income, and feel that you are accomplishing something of your OWN.

    • says

      Absolutely. There is a sense of accomplishment in running a business that I haven’t experienced in a while. I love knowing that I have created something and that I’m building something on my own. It’s a wonderful feeling. 🙂 Seems like you have a good grasp on it, too. And (even if you don’t) your photos always turn out beautifully!

  11. says

    AMAZING post Courtney!!!!. You pretty much said everything I’ve been feeling lately. I am one of those moms that works outside the home as well as inside the home. It’s not easy and I have the utmost respect for you being a business owner and being so successful. xoxo

    • says

      Thank you, Nicole! I really appreciate that! It’s hard to find a normal sense of balance in just a short 24 hour period. I always tell Josh that if we could just add 8 hours to the day, I think I would be set. I could work the 24 hours and sleep the 8. Glad to know I’m not alone. And I give you mad props for working inside and outside the home!


  1. […] and this post is week 12 of my 52 photos challenge. I’m linking up with Courtney Kirkland. Google Friend Connect is going away Spring of 2012! So, be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed so you […]

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