This post is hard for me to write.
But, I’m really struggling right now with parenting two boys.
Not in a “I’m still sleep deprived” and “Having a baby is so hard” kind of way. But in a trying to show both of my boys how much I love them kind of way.
Jonah is my easy child right now. All he needs is a clean diaper, a good feeding, sufficient nap time and some snuggles. He smiles, he coos…he’s generally happy with the little life that he’s living. His days are almost completely scheduled out now and things are good for him. He’s a bit cranky here and there, but overall…we’re acing babyhood right now.
But Noah?
Noah is a different story these days.
And I hesitate to write this because he’s such a good boy. He’s a sweet, sweet kid with the biggest heart and the most genuine enjoyment of life. He’s thriving in school, loving his teacher and his new friends. He looks forward to the days that he gets to go to school and comes home all excited and eager to tell me about his days. He’s shown more interest in reading and writing and learning than I’ve ever seen. Preschool has opened up a whole new world for him both here and away from home.
It’s his temperament and his moods that have changed so much.
I feel like I’m parenting a tiny teenager. He’s cranky and emotional and throws tantrums.
In fact, Friday afternoon was really the straw that broke the camels back. I took him out to eat after school at the Pizza Parlor on base. We met the husband for lunch and were generally having a pleasant time. See, the Pizza Parlor used to serve ice cream. But, they remodeled this summer. And when they finished for one reason or another, they didn’t bring the ice cream back.
I didn’t know that. And I told Noah he could have ice cream when he finished his lunch. When Josh took him to get ice cream and they said they didn’t have any? It was meltdown city. I mean…huge fit. He screamed. And I don’t mean like just a whine or whimper…I mean an all out SCREAM.
You guys? I was mortified. Mortified.
I’ve never been a “my child will never act like that” mom. I don’t like to say “never” but I avoid it like the plague when it comes to referencing my kids and how they will or won’t act. But, that was seriously humiliating. I know I’m not the only parent whose kid has ever freaked out in public, but I wanted to crawl under the table. Everyone was staring at him and at us and all I could think was that they were thinking we had no control over our child. That we let him get away with anything and that he was a spoiled brat.
And he’s not. He’s really not.
When we got home and both of the boys went to sleep, I got mad. Not at him, but at myself and at everyone in that pizza parlor giving us the “Wow…you guys suck at parenting” glares.
I wanted to shake them all and say, “He’s a GOOD boy. He’s been the only child for four years and he’s still getting used to the fact that he isn’t alone anymore. Don’t look at him like that. Don’t judge him because he’s upset.”
And then I got mad at myself because it was just ice cream. And his reaction to the lack of ice cream was unnecessary. Then I again went back to the idea that I had told him he could have it and that when they didn’t have it, he didn’t really understand why when that place he’d been to so many times before had sold it.
I got upset when he told me that we “never get mad at baby brother” because I know he doesn’t get that his brother isn’t old enough to misbehave yet. Because in his eyes all he sees is us loving on his brother and holding him and kissing him…while he gets in trouble for being rude or throwing fits.
This battle went on for over an hour. Back and forth on who to be frustrated with and why.
I am so torn on disciplining and parenting and setting limits right now. I KNOW that he needs limits. I know that. And he has them. He gets in trouble. He gets time outs. He gets toys taken away from him. We do all of those things.
But my heart breaks at the same time because I know that these meltdowns? These freakouts? They are his way of saying, “Mommy! Daddy! Please look at me. Please pay attention to me right now.”
And that kills me.
We don’t have family here. Noah and Jonah don’t have grandparents close by to play with them and love on them. They aren’t around to keep Jonah for a few hours so that the husband and I can just be with Noah. Can just interact with him. I know that he needs to adjust to sharing his time and I’m not saying that we should or would leave Jonah time and time again to be with Noah. But right now I find it so hard to just give him time without interruption.
I want to just sit down with him without having to stop to feed Jonah or change his diaper. I want to sit and watch him write his letters and read him stories and build gigantic LEGO towers until he falls asleep from exhaustion. I want to play Angry Birds and talk about Transformers and watch him Spiderman leap off the couch for the nine millionth time…without having to tell him to “hold on” or “wait just a second” while I tend to an upset baby.
And I want to sit and hold my baby boy without feeling guilty. Without feeling like I should be spending time with his brother. I want to sit in the rocking chair or lay in the bed beside him until he decides he doesn’t want to lay there anymore and make funny faces at him. I want to watch him coo and cackle and tickle his little belly. I want to give him kisses without worrying that I’m upsetting his brother or that his brother is feeling like he’s not getting enough of my love and attention.
This mothering two things is hard. Gut-wrenchingly hard.
I know I don’t have to choose between the two of them. I couldn’t choose between the two. I won’t choose between the two.
But how do I divide my time and conquer these tantrums? How do I make my oldest feel like he’s still as important to me now as he was before his brother was born? How do I discipline him for bad behavior without making him feel like he’s being punished because he’s not the only child anymore…or that we love his brother more?
I know we’ll find that middle ground somewhere. Eventually.
But I hope it’s sooner rather than later. Because my hormones are on over drive and I don’t know how much more of this part of parenting two I can take.
And PS…those of you who do this with more than two children? You deserve a medal.
Latest posts by Courtney (see all)
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Twitter: AlisonSWLee
says:
It IS hard. Really, really hard. The first three months with two were hell. There were MANY good moments, but there were some huge challenges with my then-2 1/2 year old (who you know, wasn’t very verbal, it was incredibly hard to explain things to him). Things got better, but there were still many meltdowns, a lot of guilt and exasperation.
Our turning point came when he turned 3. It’s like a switch came on in his head, and slowly but surely, we’re climbing out of that dark hole.
We are lucky, we have family nearby ready to take either one of the boys, so that I could have one-on-one time with one or the other. Also lucky that the baby (really, the easier of the two) goes to bed by 7pm, so I have at least an hour with #1.
Is there any way that Josh could look after Jonah for a few hours once a week so that you and Noah can have one on one special time? It could be a weekly ritual to go out for ice cream (hah, yes, I went there), something you can both look forward to.
Take heart, things DO get better. Truly. It takes a while, but you will get there. All of you.
Hugs.
Alison recently posted..Dear Future Friend
Twitter: mommaparrott
says:
Oh sweetie, I totally get it. Things WILL get better. We found the boys would act out earlier bc things get so busy with the girls. Throwing fits over the littlest of things, but like you said, it was because that “little” thing was a “BIG” thing to them and with all the other changes going on, they are just more sensitive.
Keep giving him boundaries, keep loving on him like you do & it will fall into place.
Some things we’ve been doing to give the boys that 1-on-1 time:
Jesse takes one or both boys to the store grocery shopping so I get a break & they get to hang out with just Daddy.
When I go to the commissary I take only 1 boy so they get to spend time with just me.
I also have a bag made up of little activities for each boy. They get 20 minutes of just me & them time and the other knows that they have to go play by themselves during that time. It’s just one on one time, even with other kiddos in the house. This has been a HUGE one since, like you, we don’t have family around to help out. It’s not ideal, but it works and they cherish that time alone with me.
Sweetie, give yourself a break, it’s super hard going from 1 to 2, especially when your #1 was your only one for so long. You are doing a great job and you are a wonderful Momma
xoxo
Michelle {the Momma Bird} recently posted..Free Valentine’s Day Graphics
Parenting is hard in itself, but more so when there is more than one child. We went through those same things, with each new baby that we brought home. But, trust me when I say it, it does get better. You’re all adjusting, all of you, and that takes time.
Can Josh take Jonah so that you can have that one on one time with Noah? Give him the undivided attention for the afternoon and take him to a movie or something?
Kimberly recently posted..You Are My Hope
Oh goodness, the Mama Guilt, isn’t it just AWFUL?! Hugs to ya…
…sometime it is just about the I-scream –disappointment is a BIG thing for adults and finding ways of coping and dealing. We want want we want and he wanted icecream; he has been on this planet for such a short period of time that he is just learning to deal with disappointment. If you are feeling like there isn’t enough of you, which, in my opinion, and I have two kids, too, that with home-bill paying-house cleaning-laundry-other stuff there isn’t enough… and sometimes my kids pick up on that. I think that your son had a life learning experience –I know I’ve been in situations where I was disappointed that i wanted to throw a tantrum –kids just DO IT, whereas we learn to control it and if he never experiences disappointment how will he ever learn to deal with his feelings.
YOU are doing a good job, Mama and sometimes we just have to accept as parents that sometimes people are going to ‘judge’ us and that is their business to own… it sounds like you want to be the best Mom you can be for your two boys; your kids are lucky to have you as a Mom.
Amy @mommetime recently posted..Another Day
Twitter: ashliewrites
says:
oh girl. I totally, totally get this. I am nodding my head and fighting back tears. Wish I could give you a hug…I kinda need it too, lol. Just yesterday I was completely in this spot, and throwing up my hands as to what in the HECK I should/could do to fix it. It seriously just seems like there are not enough hours in the day, not enough hands, not enough of me to go around. As you know, we just welcomed baby #3 and we couldn’t be more thrilled!! But you are right…the mommy guilt is suffocating as much as the love is overwhelming. Baby boy is easy breezy, but requires so much attention with nursing, diaper changes, etc. Going from 2 kiddos to 3 has proven to be difficult, at least for me. My sweet 2 and 3 year old girls love their little brother, but they don’t understand why mommy can’t just drop things and run to play with them. They have also been acting out a little more lately, and nap time yesterday was downright horrid. And, like you, I know they aren’t perfect but they really are SWEET, fun-loving girls! I adore their personalities and their little quirks, but lately it just seems like we are all struggling to be on the same page. And I have NO clue how to make it better. As much as I try to cuddle each of them, spend time, etc…it’s just not enough.
Anyway. I don’t have a solution. Only here to say I GET IT and you’re not alone….also? You’re a GOOD mama. It’s so evident by the way your heart is torn between your two precious boys! Praying the mommy guilt lessens for both of us and that God gives us grace during these hard times where we want so badly to love the right way.
Ashlie recently posted..In which you tell me about YOU!
Oh my… I read your words and so remember those early months of having two!
I know will find your flow, and so will Jonah – and as I’ve learned, setting limits – kids actually like, they just don’t know it when its happening.
Trust what you know in your mothering instinct is the right thing to do.
Having dates with Jonah will definitely help – I have always done that with my kids, even when my youngest was just a few months old. As mamas (and dads), we need time to connect with our kids on a one-on-one level. But I remember something my oldest’s teacher said when his baby brother was born – you can make changes to accommodate, but at the end of the day, baby brother is here to stay, and he will need to adjust to spending time together as a family of four. So, so true.
Oh and those looks from others when your kids are screaming – I get them too. My youngest is in terrible 3 stage and loves throwing huge temper tantrums everywhere.we.go. And when someone gives me a look, I just smile at them and say, “we are having a rough day, can you tell?” they usually let go of their stern look and smile, realizing their judgement helps no one. And at the end of the day – those people know NOTHING of what a good mama you are through the day. They are getting a snapshott in time, just like the crankiest kids can look so calm in a photograph. Snapshots of time, don’t always show the big picture!
Hang in there Courtney! I know it doesn’t seem like it, but a year from now, you will look back on this and smile. (or at least be happy this phase is over!
)
Kelly recently posted..day off
Twitter: callmelaurajane
says:
I don’t have a lot to say because I can’t at the moment… but, this brought me to tears. Somehow you’ve put my exact feelings into words. We are battling this right now, as I’m sure you know. Mason just doesn’t understand and I have little to no patience and I hate myself for it. I hate the way I react to him and have so much guilt about everything. This is so real to me at this exact moment, Courtney. At least I can feel comfort in knowing that I’m not the only one struggling with it.
Oh friend, I remember those days, when my children were little. My situation was complex in that I worked full time, from the time they were just about six weeks, so when I got home, I felt I hardly had any time for them — I have four!
Know that you are a good mama and doing a good job. Boys are extremely sensitive and just need time with their mamas. Perhaps taking him out on little dates, as another commenter suggested, or even having some time along with him in another room in the house, playing legos, reading, just hugging one another.
I know things will get better. Just hang in there. It’s hard to discipline our children when they simply just want our attention. It’s hard to have to put up those boundaries when we have to take care of the youngest ones.
You are doing a great job!
Barbie recently posted..Why Not Now?…An Opportunity to Make a Difference!
I have a 4 year old boy. Since the day he was born, he has never gone a single day without throwing a tantrum. The kind of tantrums where you just need to walk away for the sake of your sanity. I avoid taking him into certain stores, particularly ones that sell toys in their inventory. ( Walmart, even Rite Aid or Walgreens ) because it always turns into a tantrum about getting a toy. He has always been behind in his speech and motor skills and has to take special classes every week in pre-school. He has always been described by the teachers and the speech and OT therapists as defiant and disruptive.He was diagnosed as having a mood disorder. Some days are better than others. For some reason, he is the worst when Im around. That is something I have never understood. If he was hanging out with just my fiance, hes an angel but as soon as I walk in the room, he starts bouncing off the walls and being difficult to say the least. It has been a long, frustrating, hair pulling, tear shedding four years. Oh, and have I mentioned he has never to this day, slept through the night. Ya. Exhausting. Im 33 years old and have had thoughts now and then about having another child but my sons temperment keeps me from wanting to go forward with another. What if he/she acts the same? I couldnt handle going through this twice. I dont have the energy. So I commend you for having the strength to do it all over again. I adore my son and couldnt imagine my life without him. I just wish it was easier. I wish he was playful and happy all day everyday. I wish we could have one day where no one wants to get in the car and run far far away.
As mothers, we do the best we know how. Some days we do it flawlessly, other days we’re in survival mode. I hope it gets easier for you. I hope the weight on your shoulders gets lighter with every waking day. God Bless.
Twitter: envoutant
says:
It is tough. But maybe part of it is just him adjusting to the new baby? It may settle down a bit. Just keep doing your best! I remember feeling overwhelmed with two. And we finally got settled in and in a rhythm. Just love on him as much as you can and trust that your love is exactly what he needs right now!
Austin-Lee recently posted..Come Puke or High Fevers
I cried a little when i read this as it is exactly how i am feeling at the moment down to the feeling guilty for kissing bub #2 (3months) and feeling guilty i dont have the same time i used to with Missy moo (#1)(2.5 yrs) & the tantrums have just escalated and also know its because missy moo (#1) had 2 years of mummy & daddy to herself and now has to share. I too feel the eyes burning into me when a tantrum is thrown in public or i feel upset when one is thrown at home and i now have two babys crying their eyes out!! And i have to say ive joined them at times crying myself cos i just felt torn!! I know these moments will pass and i know ill look back as this was just a phase (even though it sure doesnt feel like it) But i am trying to give both children the same amount of attention and kisses and hugs as i possibly can and when one is asleep then the other gets my full attention, it does mean ME time is pushed to the side at the moment but if both my babies are happy then at the moment thats all that matters to me
I have even gone as far as having all the snack foods at the front of the cupboards and drink bottles filled up in the fridge or toys set up for around feed times for missy moo …because that is when tantrums mostly occur because my attention is on bub #2 and i needed to have that reasurance that both kiddies r happy for that one moment, the other is bed times when both want mummy ive had to have one in her bed and the other on the other side of me to get them both to sleep to prevent the night time tantrums,i am also in shock as how fast the tantrums escalated as my missy moo is the sweetest most clever little being and it makes me sad as i know this is not her but her feelings coming out and her thinking this is the only way to express them to me… things have to get better soon!! I just have to say i love reading your blogs it is so nice to have another mother tell of her feelings about being a mum and to put into words what most of us mums feel 
thank you for being open & honest x
Oh girly. The greatest thing I gathered from reading this is that u have incredible love for your children and because of that all will be fine! All kids throw tantrums, go through phases whatever they may be. Children in families of two, five or TEN, can thrive, feel loved and learn to love each other too. We also don’t have Family near by, but with five kids in eight years we have discovered their need for one on one and found ways to fit it in. We Bridget for babysitters and schedule dates monthly. no, it’s not easy, it takes planning and organization, but what part of life doesn’t? no, we can’t plan when tantrums will happen but having a plan on how u want to deal with them AND forgetting what anybody else thinks (because you know that doesn’t matter one single bit) will help u cope better. Good luck and keep your spirits high! God is aware of what you are going through and watching over you and your darling family!
I have been struggling with alot of the same things with our son! He’s a good boy too, but the tantrums have definitely increased since our daughter was born. It’s hard. It has to get easier though at some point I think, as they get more used to it, right?
I can tell you that a lot of this is just kid/baby juggling, and it IS hard. I struggled with the very same things when I had my third wheny twins were only 2. But now at almost 5, 5, and 3 we get a lot more individual time, even I’d it’s just a few minutes drawing at the table with 1 while the other 2 are occupied. Sneak it in wherever you can. And I highly suggest you and your husband make time to spend with just your older child, one on one. Even taking him to run a small errand while your husband watches the baby for a little bit will be beneficial. Hang in there.
I’ve been in your shoes, and I promise, this will pass. You are doing all the right things…it’s so super hard when you don’t have family nearby, but you *will* get thru this unscathed. One thing I’ve learned from my kids: they want and do forget the challenging times of when they are little and opt to mostly remember the good. What seems huge to you now is little in his mind’s eye. He is resilient, and the best thing you can do for him is be easy on yourself.
Hang in there.
I hear you. Especially at bedtime. What to do when both kids are crying and need you for equally valid reasons? I feel guilty because I often ask my husband to tend to the baby while I deal with the two year old only because I know I can calm the two year old more swiftly than my husband can. Plus the two year old is crying for me anyway (major velcro baby). Am I doing my daughter a disservice? I feel like it. And today, I had the epiphany as to why my two year old cries for my attention now when he NEVER did it prior to his sister coming (thanks to reading your post actually!). It had never occurred to me that he does that because he sees his sister cry and we tend to her — so thanks for that!
Rachel recently posted..a portrait of my children
I’ve been there too Courtney. It’s a rough spot, but it does get easier. And then it gets harder. And then easier. It’s the ebb and flow. How wonderful of you to know that Noah is still your sweet, sweet boy. But he’s human. Even the little guys go through their things. Meltdowns…don’t you wish WE could do that. Have the freedom to let it all out like that? Wherever, whenever? Gah, that’d be great. No more bottled up feelings. Meltdowns are a sign that he feels safe enough and trusts you enough to let everything out
If that is any comfort 
Big hugs!
Sarah @sundayspill recently posted..the sunday spill: introducing my self-portrait project, finally
What an honest post! I am currently pregnant with our second child and I have the same fears running through my head almost 24/7. However, as the oldest of four children, I can guarantee that your oldest son will experience no long-term effects over the attention your giving your newborn right now. The joy of having a younger sibling will soon begin to fill whatever void he may think he is experiencing right now.
You are doing a wonderful job! And the fact that you are recognizing a change in your oldest speaks volumes about you as a mother. There is not any less love to go around – your heart just grew that much bigger!
I hope the sun begins to shine a bit brighter for you soon. ((hugs))
Karen recently posted..A Girl
Twitter: LauraORourke
says:
I hear every single thing you said here. I’ve experienced it. It might be a little more defined for you because Noah is older than Cameron. Cameron really couldn’t articulate that we were getting mad at him and not Gavin – but I felt that. It is a major adjustment for everyone. And when we worried before having a second baby that big brother wouldn’t like the baby for taking away some of his attention, the truth is, he loves baby, but he takes it out in other ways.
And when everyone said “Don’t worry, your love will multiply” what they didn’t say was “but your time won’t”.
Things really started to get better for us when Gavin could really sit on the floor with Cameron and they could play together. It happened around the same time that I started nursing on a relative schedule. And Gavin’s schedule had long been set. Now Cameron is gaining a new relationship instead of losing out on time and attention.
Just remember, Noah is still a kid. He is going to have tantrums, and it is not a reflection of you AT ALL. Ignore the stares. They are from people who are ignorant towards children or who have willfully forgotten what their children were like, or who just maybe are sympathizing with you.
Dan took some time off work at the beginning and pretty much spent it all with Cameron. It was helpful.
Hugs and good thoughts for you and your family. You’ll get through this. And so will Noah. And you’ll be an awesome family!
Laura recently posted..Notes From the Other Side of a Birthday
OH Courtney, dear, you pose a lot of good questions. As far as the tantrum at the pizza place? DON’T worry about what others think. I know that’s hard, I’ve been there. But in the end it just doesn’t matter. It’s not like they are going to be talking about it tomorrow, or even thinking about it. And who cares if they were judging you? You KNOW you are a good mother. I had to learn all these things too, and I totally understand because I’ve been there too. And I know it’s pretty impossible to feel that way WHILE you’re in that moment.
And from what I can see (from where I sit) you are doing a great job mothering two. Yes, things have changed a ton for Noah and it’s hard for him to understand it all but it WILL get better soon. Many hugs to you….
Elaine A. recently posted..Great Expectations…
It’s just hard Courtney, but it will get so much easier with time. Noah will get used to having the baby around and he won’t even remember what it was like to NOT have a brother. And you’ll get better at sharing your time. And before you know it they’ll be playing together and that’s just really awesome. Then you don’t have to share your time. You’ll get there. Keep your confidence up!
Twitter: faithrphoto
says:
One thing that I have noticed as I’ve parented my kids through what feels like a billion tantrums is that sometimes they just throw all of their anger into the nearest things. He may or may not be jealous of his brother. He was exhausted from a day at preschool and disappointed, and angry – all totally normal. He might have said the whole “you’re never mad at the baby” thing just because it was the first thing he thought of that might give him an emotional upper-hand.
Screaming, yeah. Humiliating. Been there done that MANY times. We still work on “freezing” bad behavior and choosing something more calm and respectful. With five kids I now say that it’s not a matter of IF I’ll be humiliated in public it’s pretty just a matter of WHEN. I measure my parenting awesomeness now not by lack of public-humiliation but by how I handle myself when my 5 year old is screaming and hitting me at the grocery store (where did that come from?! he never does that. not even at home!) how I handle myself when my almost 2 year-old starts screaming in the Library. Do I stay calm and gentle? Then I’m doing a good job.
I would just add one piece of advice that has helped me avoid all-out freak-outs. Try to figure out what his “trigger” is. With my oldest, (and probably my 5th) it’s control. I have to let her know what comes next and give her warnings that we are about to transition to another activity. With my second and fourth it’s tiredness. If they are too tired they become completely unreasonable and my 4th is much more likely to throw a fit. With my 3rd it’s hunger. If she needs to eat you can forget about it. She’s like a ticking bomb until she gets a snack.
Faith recently posted..100 mornings: day 3 – quietness
So I didn’t even read the comments, but I’m just going to say (the thing I hate to hear the most), all of that is normal. So, SO, SOOOOO totally normal. It is his age and that he is maturing, and he is starting to realize he is his own person, which while thrilling, is also a little bit scary. Plus he is getting mature enough to learn how to manipulate you. And of course he wants more attention. All kids do. That does NOT mean that you are not giving him enough. It means he’s a normal kid. For real. I promise this will get better. Cady was 3 1/2 when James was born and we went through all of this stuff you are going through now. It’s better now. Now she gets frustrated about other things. It is all a learning and growing process. I know that doesn’t make it any easier or less stressful, but it is the truth. One day Jonah will hit this age/phase and you will look back and go, “oh yeah… I remember that.” Promise. And hugs.
Jennifer recently posted..SHUT UP!
I honestly don’t know whether to try to offer advice or just give you a hug. Just know that a lot of the time I am right there with you, but we’re figuring it out.
Robin | Farewell, Stranger recently posted..Explore: Life in Pictures, Vol. 2
Twitter: angelaamman
says:
Hugs and more hugs. You will find your way to a place that feels more comfortable. It is REALLY hard at the beginning. I remember the constant: In a minute/wait a seconds/etc. One thing that I did was every once in a while I made sure to put A first. And I would do it verbally. “I know you’re upset, D, but let me get Abbey’s milk and then I’ll help you.” And I would let my sweet baby fuss in the bouncy seat, though I know he had no understanding of “Wait a minute”. And I only did it with small things, but I do think it helped her a little to hear me telling him, “I’ll be right there”, too, so she didn’t feel like she was always second.
You are doing an amazing job. Of COURSE you love them both. It’s just hard. No one wants you to split your love but suddenly you have to split your time
angela recently posted..Metaphysical Gravity – How Do You Love?
Twitter: funnyorsnot
says:
I sure remember going through this. No advice, only empathy. I was looking through old pictures today (got caught up looking for my kindergarten photo!) and realized just how young my daughter was when born. Her babyhood was usurped so early and it made me feel really sad.
Poppy recently posted..Love Notes Between a Mother, Son, and Ann Coulter’s Vagina
Twitter: whatnowandwhy
says:
It’s easy for me to write “it passes” but that generally does nothing to help you right now and I wish there were some magic words to help you right now. I have none. You’re doing it all correctly. You’re doing what you can. What helps me when my 3 yr old is acting like this is to remember that yes, he’s three and he knows what’s expected of him, he’s ONLY three and he don’t know crap. Not really. Not fully. They’re navigating it all just like we are and I wish, oh how I wish, that we or they came equipped with buttons to help us figure out what to do in any given moment. You know you love them equally. You know you’re doing what needs to be done. It sucks, but…it passes.
Arnebya recently posted..Sometimes
I get this, I really do. It’s so hard, but it will get better. Maybe Noah would do well helping with his baby brother, to make him feel important. Hugs!
greta recently posted..Great Expectations: The Miss Elaine-ous Life
You’re already one step ahead of the game for not thinking “my child will never do that” because I totally did and payback is rough. I had so many meltdowns, and honestly I think it happens whether or not you add another kid into the mix.
My big surprise was that it doesn’t stop at 2. Or even 3. (sorry). My youngest son is 4 and it’s only just getting better. You’re a great mommy.
Lady Jennie recently posted..Life in the Trenches – Chapter 7
I’m so behind in my blog reading, so just now read this. Girl, I FEEL your pain. Like I can empathize with your every single word. It is so so so hard to know that your toddler needs and wants your attention, but you can’t give everything to them anymore like you used to. I hate have to tell Bennett to “wait just a minute”. That’s usually when he flies off the handle or does something really bad, just to the attention (although negative) that I wasn’t previously giving him. It’s hard. But the silver lining is watching the sibling relationship grow. Between the hysteria of tantrums and fights, are the tender moments that I see happening between Bennett & Easton, they some how makes things okay for me.
Mandy@ a sorta fairytale recently posted..Shoes, Sunshine, Sickies & Sessions.