Five Months

May 15, 2013 By | 2 Comments

Baby boy turned 5 months old on April 28 (I know, I’m late posting this).

He’s itching to get up and get moving. He tries to do all of the things that his brother does, but he just can’t yet. I look for him to start crawling SOON.

He’s got sitting up completely mastered. He (obviously) still topples over occasionally, but he’s pretty steady. He can roll from back to front and front to back. He has two teeth that are in completely with two more coming in (that we can see).

He doesn’t sleep as soundly as he was, thanks to the teething. He still wakes up twice a night and is up for the day by 7:30 most mornings. He takes a catnap in the morning around 10:00 and a longer nap in the afternoon around 2:00 followed by another catnap around 6:00.

I really think his big brother might be his favorite person. Ever. He sure does love Noah.

He’s still exclusively breastfed, and we haven’t really talked about or thought about weaning him yet. Maybe around eight months? I’m not worried about it now. He’s thriving and it really doesn’t bother me or annoy me yet. The only issues we have with BFing is the biting. He thinks chewing on my boob is hilarious. You can tell by the way he grins when he does it.

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Finding Validation

May 1, 2013 By | 11 Comments

I love being a business owner.

I love that I have the flexibility to create my own hours, work around my husband’s schedule, spend time with my kids during the day, and take on the kind of work that makes me happy. I can photograph what I want. I can work with the brands that I choose. I don’t have to answer to anyone but myself. If my boss is giving me a hard time, I can just take the day off. If I want to go on vacation, I go. I don’t have to request time off or put in a request for leave like my husband does.

But

Being a business owner comes with its downfalls. It comes with a price sometimes.

And lately, I’ve been struggling with one of the harder aspects of owning my own business:

Finding Validation.

With owning my own business things like promotions and awards don’t come around.

There’s no advancing. No promotions. No pay raise. There’s no recognition when you bust your butt and work an 80 hour week.

No one notices the days that you don’t sleep (or eat for that matter) so you can finish a project. No one gets excited when you crack the piece of html code or CSS configuring that’s been hanging you up for three days.

It’s a lonely and somewhat isolating thing this being my own boss.

Not to mention, most people on the outside don’t even acknowledge my work. Or the fact that I even own a business. And of those that do, most of them don’t even take me seriously. The majority of our family has no clue what I do. They seem to just assume I’m home with my kids all day twirling my thumbs. The amount of time and energy that I pour into my work just doesn’t register. Like it doesn’t exist. Like the fact that I own a business is just a facade.

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“Oh you design blogs. Isn’t that what these moms who stay home sit around and write? Blogs about how to parent?”

“Oh, you aren’t shooting photos professionally for people? You’re just another mom with a camera, right?”

I stopped telling people a long time ago that I designed blogs. Because the reaction was always the same. Mock interest and then that sliver of apprehension that followed. That apprehension that since I designed “blogs” that my job isn’t to be taken seriously. Just another mom who needed something to do during the day while she was home with her kids.

No degree behind my name. No office to drive off to or serve as a representation of the work that I do. I never realized that having an office…an actual physical space outside of your home, away from your children…gave such merit. That it somehow legitimized your work.

I’ve had a hard time feeling validated in my job. I love what I do. I love my clients. And most of my clients are mothers with children of my own, so they appreciate the work that I do and the schedule in which I do it on. I love the projects that I create. That I get to bring someones vision to life and breath creativity into their goals.

But when I crawl in bed at night, there’s still that part of me that wishes that there was more credit given to small business owners. Especially to small business owners who don’t have a handful of employees. Who don’t have offices outside of their home. Who work because they love what they do and the people they work with…

in spite of the days when they feel like their work just doesn’t matter.

Let me add, that I do receive a great deal of validation and feel very much appreciated when my clients leave wonderful testimonials or rave reviews about their experience. Please know that I’m not at all talking about how my clients make me feel here. More of an “how the outside world makes me feel” kind of thing…

11 Comments

The Skinny on Getting Skinny

April 18, 2013 By | 11 Comments

I’ve never been a stick-thin model type person. I think the smallest I ever was was a size three. And that was waaaaay back in Junior High when I was finally able to fit my ridiculously short legs and oversized rear into a pair of jeans from the Junior’s Department. Even those didn’t last long. I jumped from a size three to a five and was a size seven and then back to a three/four when I got pregnant with Noah.

I’ve always been relatively “average” when it comes to size.

Size 7/8 jeans, Medium Size shirt, 7.5 in shoes. Everything about my size was average.

When I met Josh I weighed around 114. The smallest I have ever been in my life. I was competing in pageants and was wearing a size four. I was working at the hospital on second shift, so I spent about 8-12 hours a day on my feet running around like a crazy person. I usually grabbed a sandwich for dinner and that was it. My calorie intake was low, my energy level fluctuated and I barely slept.

Not exactly the recipe for good health.

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When I got pregnant I gained about 36 pounds. The day he was born, I weighed in at 156. I remember groaning at the number and how huge I felt. But, I walked out of the hospital about 28 pounds lighter and was back in my size seven jeans within six weeks.

Fast forward four years later. I weighed 130-132 when we moved to Kodiak. After almost two years out here, I put on 15 pounds. Then added another 40 pounds to that when I got pregnant with Jonah. And this time the weight didn’t come off as easily.

It’s been an uphill battle for me losing weight after pregnancy. Having always been a size 7/8, it was a tough pill to swallow when I had to either keep wearing maternity jeans or buy a size 16. My height and body shape does not look flattering at all in a size 16. I’ve dropped nearly three sizes since then, but I’ve had to work really hard to get there.

With Noah, it seemed to just fall off. Granted I was 21 at the time, we were living in Florida where the weather is sunny and pleasant all year round, and I took my sweet new baby out walking four miles at the local park every day (Yes. Four miles. That’s how far it was around the trail two times. Took me 45 minutes).

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Now, here we are in the last frontier where a “good” day weather wise is 45 degrees and you just hope the sun stays out from behind the clouds long enough to get the groceries out of the car without freezing. We eat a lot of comfort foods out here (meat and potatoes, soup, breads….stuff to keep warm during the winter). And we have adopted some pretty crummy eating habits since we left Florida.

We used to buy fresh fruits and veggies weekly at the Produce Stand less than five minutes from our apartment.

Now? We snag something from the hot-n-ready area of the Safeway when we go grab groceries.  Not to mention that “fresh” fruits and veggies are hauled across the country, thrown on a plane or a barge and delivered out here past their quality fresh date. So, when we do get fruit, you may get a few days out of it (if you’re lucky) before it gets old and wrinkly and starts to mold.

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The other day the husband and I both just reached out breaking point. I’ve been trying to eat better and lose weight since November, but it’s hard when no one else in the house is on board and has no reason to count calories and watch what they eat. But, the husband decided it was time for him to step back and reevaluate his eating habits as well. So, we made the joint decision to start out by cutting red meat and processed foods out of our diet completely. That’s a big step for the two of us because we are big meat eaters. Being from the south, we are used to our meat & potatoes type dinners pretty frequently.

We’ve been on this about a week now, but we both already feel 100 times better. The first two days I felt a bit “off.” I didn’t drink my coffee in an attempt to cure my caffeine addiction and help curb my need for Dr. Pepper later in the day. I’m sure eventually I’ll start drinking coffee again in the morning, but in moderation. I need to get a handle on my need for a caffeine fix, first.  Surprisingly, there were only two days of caffeine deprived headaches.

I’ve started going to bed at a decent hour at night. Typically, I stay up until midnight or later to work or write. But, I’m opting right now to just do as much work as I can during the daytime and go to bed and get some decent sleep at night. I’ve been in bed by 10:00 every night for the last two weeks.

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I’ve completely cut out junk food. No candy. No cookies. No cakes or pie. No chocolate. The only thing sweet that we keep is Nutella (which I’ve just recently come to love). We stocked up on Granola, Fresh Fruits, Skim Milk (for smoothies) and Special K cereals and snacks.

I’m using My Fitness Pal to track my calorie intake and weight loss and so far, I’ve lost about 2 pounds. I had a little crisis on Facebook the other day when the scale went UP instead of down. But, I increased my calorie intake by 250 and the numbers have gone down again (turns out I was eating too few calories).

I know a lot of people hop on the weight loss bandwagon and then fall off again when they get to the weight they are wanting to reach. But, we’ve really made a lifestyle change around here.

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While I want to lose the weight and be back in my normal size jeans, I’m really more hell-bent on losing the weight and keeping it off for my own health. Obesity, high blood pressure, diabetes, and a slew of other weight related health issues run in my family. My mom has struggled with her weight for as long as I can remember and I don’t want to find myself in the same situation 20 years from now. I want to be healthy and fit for my husband and for my boys. Healthy and active so that I can go and enjoy my kids when they’re out at the park running around and having fun.

I want to be able to run beside them without feeling winded. I want to be able to keep up with their energy (at least, for the most part…). I want to still be in good shape when my grandchildren are born way down the road. I want to be able to enjoy them. And I want to instill a healthy lifestyle and eating habits in my boys so that they grow up fit and active.

I’m really beginning to believe that that’s one of the best gifts I can give my kids…a healthy ME and equip them to be the healthiest THEY can be.

What are some of your favorite get fit activities or recipes? Share them with me! We’re looking for as many yummy new recipes as we can find!

11 Comments

Two Brothers

April 15, 2013 By | 4 Comments

Jonah is going on five months and we are finally starting to hit a stride around here. While there are still several days where I end up collapsing in bed when the day is over, I feel like there are more days now where I sit back and can say, “This isn’t so bad. Maybe I can handle having two kids…”

I think what’s making it so much easier, is watching these two interact. Watching their bond start to grow and develop…

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Jonah idolizes his big brother. He loves him to pieces. He sits all day, every day and just watches him. He’s reaching the point now where he can interact and “play” a bit. Noah gets his toys out and sits with him on the floor to play. They eat breakfast together every morning, they watch cartoons together, they talk and interact. It’s heartwarming and makes me love the fact that I have two boys even more. There are so many times during the day where Jonah only wants his brother…times when Noah is the only person that can calm him down when he’s cranky and make him feel better when he’s fussing.

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There are days where I hang my hand and want to run and hide under the blankets until bedtime…

but most days?

I’m just happy that I get to spend my days with them

4 Comments

It’s a Big World

April 2, 2013 By | 9 Comments

To my Sweet Boys…

Growing up, I always thought that I would be a girl mom. I was raised with girl cousins and a little sister. While there were boys in our family, we were never super close, so I knew next to nothing about the ins and outs of being around boys. Aside from the fact that boys were a little smellier than girls and that their sports teams were more physical (which, I still say is up for debate. If you’ve watched a girls softball tournament, you can understand my hesitation in believing that one…), I was completely clueless about what made up the male lifestyle.

I envisioned pink and yellow nurseries, frilly dresses and those little lacy underpants that had the ruffles on the rear. Tea parties, Barbie dolls, and eventually cheerleading and Girl Scouts. I anticipated passing all of my beauty queen knowledge down to my daughter and eventually teaching her to put on makeup and do her hair.

And then you two came along and turned my world, and my heart, upside down.

I remember your Grandmommy telling me that I would never know a love like the one that lives between a mother and her son. Since your daddy is one of two boys, she knew a thing or two about raising boys and about the ins and outs of the relationships between mother and son. I was scared to dive into this world of dirt, monster trucks and all things creepy crawly, but she reassured me that everything would be okay.

And it is.

In fact, it’s better than anything else that I could have ever imagined.

I know every mother loves her child. Of that, there is no question. But the love that I have for you two? This bond that seems to exist between us? It’s unlike anything I’ve ever known and it’s indescribable to anyone except those other moms who have the pleasure of raising boys.

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Watching the two of you explore and learn about the world around you is satisfying in a way that nothing else ever could be. Despite the vast difference in your ages and the stages you are in, you are both curious and eager to see what’s going on…

Noah- my big boy. My handsome little four year old who is growing so much faster than I ever really wanted you to. You are curious about everything. You wonder about everything. I’ve never known anyone who is so…intuitive and so vastly imaginative. Your creativity baffles me and your innocence humbles me. You see good in everyone and have a sweetness to you that I hope you will hold onto for years and years to come.

Jonah- my baby. My squishy little snuggle monster. You want so badly to be a big boy. You are dying to be a big kid. To follow your brother around and do all of the things that he’s doing. You are trying your hardest to get out of this baby phase and move on to the next one. The stage that allows you to get on the move and start exploring and learning about the world around you. But I am determined to hold onto this baby phase for just a bit longer. To keep you tiny and unscathed for a bit longer.

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Part of me will always want a little girl to do the girly things with…the hair, the makeup, the Barbies and the dolls.

But you two? You fill a piece of my heart than no daughter ever could. You fill up a void that I didn’t even know existed.

Being a boy mom gives me a whole different perspective on the world. The perspective that comes from laying in the grass and covering yourself in dirt. The one that’s a result of seeing things through rambunctious, curious little eyes. Eyes full of wonder and of eager exploration.

I hope that you will always show me your world. You will always help me see things the way you see them.

I love you both more than you know.

To the ends of the universe and back again.

Love always,

Mommy

It’s that time again to link up with my Clickin Mom gals and participate in the monthly blog circle! Keep the circle going and pop on over to see what Megan has captured this month!

9 Comments

Jonah is four (months)

March 28, 2013 By | 2 Comments

::Sigh::

I can’t believe I’m writing Jonah’s four month post already. Seems like just yesterday that this sweet little butterball came into our lives. I completely skipped out on his three month update, but in truth there wasn’t a whole lot to talk about. Other than showing you guys how cute he is and how much we love him.

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This month seems to have brought on a lot for our littlest dude. He’s got four teeth coming in on the bottom. All four of his bottom front teeth are peaking through. Two are very clearly in, the other two are just starting to show their little white tops. He won’t have his gummy baby smile for much longer. Teething has been killer the last couple of weeks. Not so much an all day thing, but just off and on; usually right after lunch. He isn’t even really all that cranky, he just wants to be held and snuggled. Most days, I’m happy to oblige.

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We are still exclusively breastfeeding, though we do throw a bottle in there from time to time to make sure he hasn’t forgotten how to take one. We are going on vacation in a little over a month and the husband and I will be taking our first trip away, alone, in over two years. So he’s got to remember how to drink from a bottle so his grandma can feed him while we’re away. We have given him baby rice and oatmeal a few times and he loves it. Just like his brother, I expect he’s going to wean from milk early and be eager to enjoy big boy food.

As for sleeping….

We have finally gotten him out of his swing and we’re working on getting him into the pack-n-play in our room. He’s getting there. It’s a slow process. He tends to start out in his pack-n-play and then ends up snuggled up next to me before morning (i.e. I am too lazy to sit up and feed him so I bring him to bed with us and nurse him while I doze). I don’t mind it too much. He’s a sound, solid sleeper. Most nights he’s in bed by 9:00 at the latest. I usually get a four-five hour stretch the first part of the night, a middle of the night feeding around 1:00-2:00 am and then he’s up by 7:00 most days.

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He still won’t take a pacifier and doesn’t really suck his thumb, but he is a finger sucker and a chewer. He loves his little connecting rings (the ones you can attach to the carseat that just link together) and occasionally enjoys a good chew on Sophie the Giraffes legs. Typically though, it’s his fingers. He hasn’t really taken to a lovie of any kind yet. Noah was a little older (around 18 months) before he ever got attached to anything, so I don’t expect Jonah to be any different…if he ever does get attached to anything anyway.

He’s wearing 3 month, 3-6 month and the occasional 6-9 month outfit and size two diapers (though I did just order him size three’s). He’s started to discover his feet this week so he’s enjoyed playing with his toes. He’s also a hair puller and a face rubber. He likes to snatch on my ponytails during the day, but he also loves to scratch and rub my face and my arms when he’s nursing or snuggling. He is a wee bit of a mama’s boy, and I absolutely adore that about him. He’s also SO close to sitting up on his own with anyone helping him hold himself up and he’s got the rolling from back to tummy thing down.

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That being said, he also idolizes his brother. I mean big time. There are days where I can’t get him to calm down when he’s upset and cranky, and all it takes is Noah coming over to him, sitting down in front of him and playing. He doesn’t even have to play with him. He just has to be within visual range. It is the sweetest thing and it absolutely melts my heart to see this little boy so in love with his big brother already. I look at the two of them and think of that Campbell’s Soup commercial that was on over Christmas about the two brothers with the baseball glove. It just turns me into a big mush puddle to watch them interact.

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And Noah? Noah loves him to pieces. He dotes on him and plays with him and loves on him like it’s HIS baby (which, in his mindset, it is). They sit on the floor and eat breakfast together every morning (well, Noah eats…Jonah watches) while they “watch” cartoons. Noah makes sure to tell Jonah all about his day at school on the ride home every afternoon. He reads him stories, draws him pictures, shares his toys with him. It’s the best to watch their budding relationship grow right before my eyes. We’ve had our issues with Noah adjusting to not being the only child anymore, but never has he shown any animosity or frustration or dislike toward Jonah.

I know they say that your heart grows with each child, but I seriously can’t imagine it getting any bigger. This little boy just filled a corner of my heart with so much love and adoration. Love that I didn’t even know I had because of how much I already love and adore Noah. I don’t remember how we got along without him and I certainly can’t imagine life without him in it now. He fills a void we didn’t even know existed. One thing is for sure, this happy little chubster knows that he’s loved by everyone in this house.

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2 Comments

I Became “that” Blogger

March 25, 2013 By | 7 Comments

I swore when I was pregnant with Jonah that I wouldn’t become that blogger.

You know. The one who has a baby (or has her second, third, fourth, etc. baby) and forgets that she ever once existed on the web.

Forgets about her blog, her readers, social media presence, and all that goes along with it.

Well. I did. I became that blogger.

I have successfully managed to blog a grand total of 20 times (this post will make 21) since the beginning of 2013. I have completely fallen off the radar.

I really didn’t mean to. But, with a now four month old who has cut his first tooth, a four year old who is in Preschool three days a week, a business that has taken off so far in 2013 and my new found drive to pursue all things photography in my nonexistent spare time, this blog has just fallen to the wayside.

So here’s the rundown of what’s gone on with us so far this March…

…Jonah’s first tooth has finally broken through his little gums. I can see the beginnings of about four more, so he won’t be single toothing it for long.

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…Noah’s still rocking at school. He recognizes almost all of his letters now, knows all of their sounds, and his handwriting is getting SO good (for a four year old, that is).

…we all got sick a few weeks ago. Noah first, then Jonah and then myself. I felt like a zombie for about four or five days. My husband (God love him) even went and bought me a Keurig to help make up for my exhaustion.

…it snowed. And snowed again. And snowed another time. And I’m sick of it. Where is Spring?!

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…I’ve worked my rear off. I’m hosting a photography workshop in Alabama this summer when we go home to visit, so I’ve been putting things together for that. I’ve also filled my schedule up completely with Website and Blog Designs for March and April. I’ll be looking forward to my vacation when it rolls around.

…I’m at the tail end of a Clickin Moms photography workshop (Lifestyle with Kids, if you’re curious as to which one). I’ve found a passion for creating beautiful images that I seem to have misplaced this past winter. I’m really looking forward to showcasing more photos here (assuming that I keep up with blogging) and reaching for new creative goals.

…I also signed up for two additional workshops in April (Fine Art & Visual Expression and Mastering Natural Light Indoors). I know. I’m just asking for a mental breakdown with everything I’m juggling.

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…I’m photographing my first wedding April 6 for some friends of ours. Noah is going to be their ring bearer. He’s wearing a suit and everything. I’m seriously so excited to show you guys how cute he looks in his little getup.

…I am two-three pounds from my pre-Jonah weight. I’m dying for the weather to clear so I can start running again (you can’t really run on iced over sidewalks).

…I put on a dress and got fixed up Saturday night for the first time in over two years. I haven’t worn a dress since we moved to Kodiak. What’s the point? The weather always sucks and there’s no where to go. It felt good. And it felt even better since the dress that I wore was one I bought way before Jonah was even thought of.

…Lastly, these boys? These two little guys that God blessed me with? They have continued to steal my heart. Their little relationship as brothers is growing. Noah loves to “play” with Jonah. They sit together in the mornings and watch cartoons before Noah goes to school. Jonah in his Bumbo seat and Noah on the floor. Sometimes they hold hands. Usually, Jonah just shifts his attention back and forth from Noah to the TV. It melts me completely. It really does. I’m so blessed.

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7 Comments

Four Years with my SLR

March 19, 2013 By | 17 Comments

I glanced down at my calendar the other day and realized that it had been exactly four years since I bought my first SLR camera. Four years. Where does time go? Ask anyone who pursues and enjoys photography as much as I do and they will most likely tell you that their camera is like another child. Some of us them even name their cameras. It’s been an amazing four years and when I went back and started looking through my images, I was amazed at how much my shooting style and my technique has improved and changed over the years.

When I first started out, I had very limited knowledge about photography. I knew a bit about film photography from my time on the high school yearbook staff and my years in the pageant world. But digital was still fairly new. I frequented the I {Heart} Faces community a lot and stalked blogs like Pixel Perfect and Click it Up a Notch completely in awe of their beautiful images. I wanted to shoot images like that. I needed to capture those kind of photos of my family. When Noah was born, I finally convinced my husband that an SLR would be a good investment. So in February 2009, after we got our tax refund, we waltzed into Sears and I bought my first SLR: A Canon Rebel Xsi.

I thought that since I had read the photography forums, had a general understanding of what Aperture, Shutter Speed and ISO were that I would just be able to pick my camera up and start shooting. Couldn’t be that hard, right?

WRONG.

In those first two years, I made a lot of mistakes. The biggest being that I actually thought I was good enough to shoot for other people. What I wouldn’t give to be able to redo some of those first ‘sessions’ I did.

I made every new photographer mistake in the book.

I overexposed…

I tilted my frame waaaay too much…

I used editing software that I had no clue how to use…

I over sharpened and overprocessed…

I shot in absolutely horrid lighting situations…

I didn’t bother to change my white balance. Ever…

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Every once in a blue moon I would capture an image that had something right in it.

The first time I captured an image where Noah’s eyes were sharp and in focus, I couldn’t believe it.

 

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When I bought my first prime lens and got that “blurry” background, I did a dance. I didn’t matter that the picture really had no purpose and I can’t remember much about this shot other than that it was the first time I had taken my SLR out and about.

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2011 & early 2012 were a lot of the same mistakes. I bought my first set of “expensive” actions, but apparently I never knew anything of opacity. We moved to Alaska in January ’11 and I really started to push myself to figure things out. I was tired of my photos not looking like I wanted them to look and all of my time in doors during the winter led me to join Clickin Moms. For starters, I bought a few trial periods. Never really sure if I was going to be able to dive into photography head first like I wanted. I was hesitant. I think I felt more comfortable not knowing and not getting good photos than I was with knowing how to create the images and still being unsatisfied with my results. Throw in the added challenge of learning to shoot in very cool light, and a lot of my images were just….bad.

My exposure was off, my editing was over done and my composition lacked anything special or interesting. My images just didn’t have any meaning behind them. I shot for the sake of shooting and posting pictures on Facebook. But they were nothing more than that.

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In November 2011 I took my first workshop with a local photographer. I had been shooting on manual mode for a few months, but that workshop really sealed my knowledge of Metering and tying all of the elements together. And in January 2012 I finally upgraded my Canon Rebel and bought the Canon 7D. I traded my kit lens and nifty fifty for a 50 mm 1.4 and a Sigma 30 mm.

My images were still overexposed almost ALWAYS and my processing was all over the place. I kept trying to recreate editing styles that I saw other photographers using and it just didn’t work for me. I was still unhappy with the quality of my images and still feeling frustrated with my work. I thought seriously about just calling it quits. I had a graphic design business, so why did I need photography? But I couldn’t do it. Creating beautiful images filled a void in my life. Even if I wasn’t shooting for clients and making money or running a steady photography business, I loved shooting. And I couldn’t give it up.

So, I finally caved and bought a Lifetime membership to Clickin Moms in March of last year during the birthday celebration. I had joined under trial runs a few times and never really dove too much into the forums. But, after reading a few other blogs and hearing so many people talk about how helpful their community was, I bit the bullet and signed up. I signed up for good because I knew that another trial run wouldn’t force me to make the most of the forum and the community. At that point I was capturing images that I liked (composition wise) but my settings and editing were still off. Blown out skin tones, images that were WAY too bright. So I pushed on and dug, dug, dug into their forums.

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Sometime toward the middle of last year, things started to click. I bought a few Clickin Mom breakout sessions, did an editing mentoring session with April Neinhuis, and stepped away from using actions for everything. I learned to clean edit on my own and started to figure out my style and the images that I liked…what type of work spoke to me and what kind of images I wanted to capture. It was around then that I realized how much I enjoyed lifestyle work rather than standard portraiture. Capturing details and things that tend to go unnoticed. Being home all day with (now) two kids, I spend a lot of time trying to capture their childhood and it’s eventually what I want to do for clients.

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Now here we are in 2013. I’m in the middle of one Clickin Moms Workshop and I’ve got two more coming up in April that I’ve decided to take. I’ve learned to use and manipulate my camera to do what I want it to do. I’ve found a style of shooting that I love and can’t seem to get enough of. I’ve started to discover my editing style and I’m seeing more consistency in how I process my photos. I’m way, way beyond my knowledge and abilities of four years ago. Despite thinking that I wasn’t moving forward and that nothing was changing, I have come a long way.

And I’m going to continue to move forward. Continue to progress and get better. I have big goals and big ambitions when it comes to photography. I have big dreams for a future steady business and the only way to get there is to keep practicing. I know a lot of new photographers read my blog and follow my posts and images. I also know how frustrating it can be to see other people’s work and think that they are better than you. My advice to you?

Keep Shooting.

Keep Practicing.

Every professional was once an amateur and they only got better by practicing. So don’t let your own doubts trample on your goals.

markers Lifestyle-with-Kids-Week-One-24-2 Boys Best Friend negative-space

If you’re in the Dothan, Alabama area and you’re interested in learning the basics of Photography, check out the information on my very first Workshop! Seats are available now!

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Food Photography

March 2, 2013 By | 14 Comments

Last month I mentioned that I had teamed up with a wonderful group of ladies from Clickin Moms to do a monthly Blog Circle to push ourselves to be creative with our photography. Each month we’re given a theme and then we post the photos from that particular theme on our sites.

This months challenge was Food Photography.

I admit, I struggle with food photography. Big time.  Unfortunately, I only snagged a couple of photos this month that I was particularly proud of. Since I don’t often photograph food with my Canon, I pushed myself to get a bit more creative using my iPhone for this months challenge. I’m a HUGE Instagram and iPhoneography fan and I always love to see quality photos taken with a phone. That said, all but the very last shot here were taken with my iPhone 4S.

 

2013-02-13-13.15 Jelly Toast and Coffee Strawberry Ice Cream Chocolate Covered Strawberries

Continue the circle! Head over to visit Megan at Click Happy Life!

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My Favorite Child..

February 25, 2013 By | 12 Comments

One thing everyone told me when I was pregnant with Jonah was that I would have no trouble loving both of my boys the same. That while I may love them differently, it would still be the same kind of love…the same amount of love. That part is true. I love Jonah as much as I love Noah; and I love Noah as much as I could ever love Jonah. Both of these boys make up entirely different parts of my heart, but complete my life in a way I never knew possible.

Reading Quietly on the Chair

What people don’t tell you is that you will have a favorite child.

There’s no way to get around it. I remember that when I was a kid, I used to ask my parents who their favorite daughter was (I still swear it was always my little sister). They never came out and said that they didn’t have a favorite. They just always said that they loved us both the same.

Now, I know that they replied with that because we, as parents, do have a favorite child.

When Jonah is cranky and teething…constantly whimpering and whining because his little mouth is aching and Noah is on the couch playing quietly on the LeapPad, Noah is my favorite child.

When Noah is blatantly defying us and not doing what he’s told…when he’s mixing all nine new tubs of Play-doh together in one big blob (despite being told repeatedly not to) and Jonah is sitting calmly in his bouncy seat making silly faces at me, Jonah is my favorite child.

When Jonah is awake at 3:00 am for the sixth time since being put to bed for no other reason than because he wants to be held and Noah is in his room sleeping soundly, Noah is my favorite child.

When Noah is throwing a tantrum and screaming because things aren’t going just like he wants them to and Jonah is nuzzling sweetly against my shoulder and making sweet baby sounds, Jonah is my favorite child.

3 months old

See, it’s not about loving one more than the other. It’s about the natural reaction to prefer one child’s behavior over the others. I love both of my boys with my whole entire heart. I couldn’t imagine life without either of them. But, when I’m sleep deprived, over-loaded with work, and in need of a break…it’s easy to have a favorite in whichever child is giving me the least trouble on any given day.

It’s also about realizing that neither of my kids are perfect, and never will be. They will both disappoint me. They will both upset me. They will both let me down.

But, they will both bring me joy. They will both  make me giggle and laugh. They both make me smile.

They will both continue to bring me more happiness than I ever knew was possible.

Even if I do occasionally play favorites.

What about you? Can you admit to having a favorite child at some point or another?

 

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Something for Saturday

February 23, 2013 By | 2 Comments

copyright | courtney kirkland

Hope everyone has a great weekend! I’ll be spending mine soaking up some much welcomed sunshine with this little guy and his big brother!

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