Dearest Baby Boy,
Should I even call you that anymore? You have grown up so much over the past year. I can not even believe it. It was this day, one year ago, that my life changed for the better. I dreamt about you, prayed for you, and thought about you from the first day that I found out that you were coming. This day finally came, and you arrived. You didn’t really cry…more or less grunted a little bit. Taking charge right from the beginning to let the doctor know you didn’t appreciate someone smacking your little butt.
I still remember the exact way that I felt when they handed you to me. You lifted your little head and looked around, those bright blue eyes examining the world around you. I remember daddy standing over me, smiling at you, as you reached your little hand up and took his finger…almost like you were shaking his hand in introduction.
Your first week at home, I was terrified. I have never loved another person in this world in the way that I love you. All that I wanted was to do everything right for you. To do things perfect for you, because that is what you deserved. You didn’t sleep much. But I enjoyed every moment that we spend together. Me, you, and daddy.
As time has passed this year, I have received the greatest blessings any woman could ask for. I have been able to spend each and every day with you. Watching you grow, watching you learn, watching you discover the world around you. I hold every moment of your past in my heart….something that I will cherish eternally. No one will ever take those moments away from me. Watching you sleep under daddy’s arm, feeling your tiny little body as you slept on my chest. I sometimes would just sit and watch you. Not accomplishing anything in our house that needed doing…just because I was so amazed by you and all that you could do. I took a lot of pictures. Of everything that you did.
You are such a special little boy. I know that one day you are going to grow up, one day you will make a mistake, one day you will do something that I don’t like. But you are my son. Flesh of my flesh. Nothing you ever do will make me not love you. Nothing you ever say will make me not love you. You, son, hold my heart in a way that no one else ever will.
I want nothing but the best for you in life. Nothing but happiness, nothing but good things. I pray for you daily. I pray that God would reveal himself to you in ways that no one has ever imagined. I pray that he keeps you safe, keeps you healthy, keeps you happy. I pray for your future, I pray for you life.I pray for that special girl that one day will carry you away from me.
But always remember, no matter where you go or what you do, that mommy and daddy love you more than anyone else ever will. You are our heart. Our pride and joy. Our little miracle. Our very own gift from heaven.I wish you and pray you only the greatest things in life, son. Only the best. I am already so very proud of you and all that you are. I know we have so much in our future and I look forward to each one of them.
Happy First Birthday, Little Monkey.
I love you so much more than I could ever, ever say.